My older cat has had allergies all summer.  It sounds so pathetic.  Once he turned 11, something inside of me turned on.  Sometimes I can dial it down, but there's a steady fear that he's aging quickly and our time is limited. Maybe that's why I felt like I was punched in the gut when the vet told me Tess's test results were abnormal.  Tess was just in for her senior check-up in May and everything came back normal.  Second punch.  How could things change so much in 3 months? We have to wait 3 more weeks for the next round of bloodwork to see if her levels have changed.  To see if it's leukemia.

It seemed like just when all of my shit was working itself out, her health problems started.  An ear infection, a broken tooth, and then this.  I feel really bad, like somehow my bad luck transferred to her.  I wish I could take it back and take all of the bad hits for her.  I feel so fucking guilty.  

When I saw Bully this month they played this song and I could have cried.  It was so...more than nice...to see Bully in concert again.  I felt like I got a little part of myself back.  

But I'm that, nah, nah, I'm this, right?

Labels: Bully, concerts, emotions, live shows, Tess