I've come to realize that I'm still not living. I am far from having the adventure I desire, far from fully fitting in with the different groups of people I meet. I feel like I'm in high school all over again.

I reclaimed Mean Everything To Nothing from my car and am obsessing over The River. I want that life we spoke of, late that night in the hall. Put me in an eco-efficient Mystery Machine and we'll build our tents in parking lots, in the woods by the old fence links, in a desert near a cactus. We'll chase bands and we'll follow sunsets. We'll finally find the soundtrack to our lives. And we'll make mixes of our feelings, box them up and send them to the proper soul. We'll shop at vintage stores and I'll build a collection of sunglasses. You'll paint your fingers the colors of the rainbow and we'll dance like hippies in the rain wearing clothes made out of garbage bags. The stream will overflow and I'll pose by a truck that hasn't moved in years. We'll play house and I'll cook if you clean. We were going to make this happen. Or maybe I'll go it alone.

Labels: Best of Libellus