Today I experienced one of the worst migraines I’ve had in months. Storm pressure. Lack of sleep from said storm system. It hit so fast I didn’t really see it coming. Like flipping a lighter open, pressing down on that wheel and click there’s a flame.

I took my medicine at the onslaught, but it was faster and I was nauseous for two hours. Threw up those pills with no desire to repeat that process.

Worse still The Voyager is stuck in my head. Not what I want there. Not today.

I spent 3 hours in bed and with no medicine my head did not get better. The cats only made it worse. But when I could sleep, my mind reached out for someone I have no right to anymore. It usually brings me a little sadness to wake from dreams of him. It happens often enough, as if the absence of each other has just amped up his dream presence. But today I’m leaning into it.

This person is the only person I’ve come across that I can stomach being around when I have a migraine. The only person who really brought me comfort without aggravating me. I feel awful about it, but I am extremely sensitive during a migraine and even the most caring people can scrape my ears with the persistent noise they unintentionally make. But he took care of me. Even if that was one of the worst things about being with me.

I miss that. All I can hope for is to find someone else that can comfort me on that level. And for cheaper, faster break throughs in medicine. And for my cats to have full tummies when a migraine hits.

Labels: migraine