"I really want a boy. Especially now."

I heard that maybe 5 times last night. It is the new thing on all of my girl friend's minds. Like the November Single Blues or something. Sure it has it's variations - boy, guy, man, lover, girl - but that's all based on how we view ourselves.

The thing about that phrase, is the rant you're supposed to endure after it's spoken, and the obligatory response you're supposed to give. You know, the friendly head nod and a few kind words. Well that's getting on my nerves. Nowadays an obligatory man hating rant either slides itself into the conversation or else you face the ranter's pitiful glance that you've been single longer than them.

"So, are there any new guys in your life?" (Insert girls if you feel the need.)

You get that question from all sides. Parents, siblings, nosy grandparents, hometown neighbors, people you work with, and most especially, your hair dresser. When I got my hair cut this question blind sighted me after a small conversation on little kids trick or treating. Well whatever, it happens everywhere. "No."
My singlehood brings her to sympathize with, "Yeah, there's been a lot of man hating from my female clients lately."
"I'm not a man hater, I just don't feel like I need to bother with all that right now."

Well you can see where this went. Complete silence for close to five minutes.

Say it aint so a-woah-a-woah.
Your drug is a heartbreaker.
Say it aint so a-woah-a-woah.
My love is a life-taker.

I'm reading Love Monkey for the first time, and between it and Weezer all I want is to have a crush. But take it from OK Go, it's tough to have a crush. I want that stupid bubbly feeling and the uncontrollable dreamy smiles. I'm just not ready to join those silly girls who doodle names in their notebooks and drift out of important conversations because something that was said reminded them of their crush. As if.

I think.
I think...
I think I've gone so long being technically single that I do more than just tolerate it. I live it. Most girls, on the other hand, have difficulties adjusting back to their single selves. And that's what annoys me the most about crushes. Just when I get my friends back into the swing of girls nights and remembering that their current boyfriend is not on the top of my conversation charts, well then they go and fall for some other boy whom I'm stuck hearing all about.

I sound like the ultimate loveshit hater. I'm not. I dream lovely dreams too. I just try to dream quietly.

Labels: Best of Libellus, crushes, the single life